Boxes

We can’t learn much inside a box. Trouble is, most of us like our boxes.

A friend of mine is big on party games that push people outside their box – outside their activity comfort zone and people clicks. One such game was for his housewarming party. Participation was required and teams were selected at random with no switching. We were to disburse into surrounding neighborhoods to knock on doors and ask for items on a list that my friend wanted for his house – such as an interesting seat, something to drink out of, or a plant. The items could be acquired by other means as long as no money was spent, but getting to know the neighbors was the preferred method.

Are you crazy? I thought. I am being split up from the only people at this party that I know, and you want me to knock on some stranger’s door asking for them to give me things?

No one on my team was particularly thrilled about the activity. We started by trying to avoid door-knocking. It was after dark, and Rite-Aid had made the mistake of keeping house plants for sale outside. So there was one item. But as mostly non-criminal-types, we eventually we had to break down and start knocking. It was really embarrassing at first, but the neighbors were surprisingly open to giving away the items we requested. We made it back to the house with the entire list and ending up winning the game! It was the most fun I’d had in while.

The company I work for does something similar to break the “freshmen” new hires for the year out of their “new” box. They are asked to put on the entertainment at the Christmas party. You can bow out, but it is frowned upon. You can do whatever you want, and they won’t tell you what last year’s group did. I was mortified when I found out. But I participated anyway and that project is one of my favorite memories at my job. I developed camaraderie with the other “freshmen” of that year that otherwise would have been limited to the people in my department.

The point is that we cannot learn and grow as people unless we are pushed outside of our comfort zones. This includes difficult times in our life such as financial challenges, relationship problems, or anything that may not be going quite how we want it to. Right now I am at work when all I want is to be home with my baby. My husband is home with the baby and going crazy. I want nothing more than to trade places but it is financially impossible. We might both be more comfortable in the other’s place. But then how would we learn and grow?

I am learning to appreciate time with my child since it is limited now, and I am learning how to relate to my husband in a different dimension. Being home with my child the first three months taught me so much, and now my husband is getting a chance to learn all those magical mysteries a baby reveals to you, as well as how to be nurturing, patient, and self-motivated. Right now I still cry every morning that I can’t be with my son, but I know in my heart that God has given us each a great gift through our time and place in life that will help us grow into the people we need to be in order to best serve Him.